aprons May 21, 2010

I love aprons.  Well, to be specific, I love hostess aprons.  And vintage-style aprons.  I think there’s something about them that is so house-wifey, so 1950′s, so homespun and comfortable.  I love the styles and even more, I love what they mean.  I am a tad obsessed with 50′s and 60′s culture, as it relates to women.  To me, aprons are a bit of a mouthpiece for the begining of the changes that came about defining women and women’s roles. 

My dear husband gave me my first hostess apron this year for my birthday.  It’s black-and-white with wide, black straps, a deep halter-style neck and pockets.  It’s beautiful.  I feel like I should be prepping for a party every time I put it on.  I feel in command of the kitchen, like a person who knows what she is doing, someone who can create wonderful, home-baked foods that will delight her family. 

I recently found a new great apron website (http://www.heavenlyhostess.com) and looked at them with a great deal of “ooh” and “aah” until I was overcome with sticker shock.  Um, $85 for an apron?  $125??!  Hmph, I can make those.  I can make those for less, right?  Well, I thought so.  

I looked around online to see about finding patterns.  Not only did I find patterns, but videos and step-by-step instructions.  (How adorable is this? http://sew4home.com/projects/kitchen-linens/578-retro-fun-vintage-style-apron.)  Let me start by saying I am NOT a seamstress.  Not even a little bit.  I can repair teddy bears and fasten buttons.  I made a blanket for Logan for his second Christmas.  And that is about the scope of my knowledge.  I may be a little under-experienced for a fancy vintage-inspired hostess apron. 

So, for now, I think I’ll stick to wearing my beautiful birthday apron and work on being a domestic godess in the kitchen – and bake my packaged mini muffins.

M

but I don’t cook April 27, 2010

I love finding new websites that are instantly favorites.  My newest love is Smitten Kitchen.  It’s actually a blog, which makes it that much more interesting to me.  Now, for those of you who know me, you know that I love baking, not cooking.  I like making party food, not dinner.  But when I came across Smitten Kitchen, I started daydreaming that I could love cooking. 

The photos are beautiful, recipies straightforward, and she clearly writes with a lot of passion.  I felt inspired to throw on my apron and pull out some never-before-used kitchen utensils.  Check it out for yourself and see if you love it, too.

http://smittenkitchen.com/

birthday extravaganza April 22, 2010

This week we are celebrating Logan’s 6th birthday, and some-odd anniversary of my long-past 21st birthday.  Okay, okay…35.  Geez.  Who in the world is this 35-year-old…that has a 6-year-old?!? 

As much as I don’t like getting older (or look like I’m getting older), I love birthdays.  I love to celebrate life and look back on what the past year or years have brought.  Truthfully, I really love having a day where I am celebrated!  I can’t wait for my actual birthday (tomorrow).  I think, somewhat selfishly, it might be one of my favorite days of the year.  Actually, celebrating my husband’s and my kids’ birthdays are probably my favorite days of the year.  That’s the nice thing about Logan’s birthday and my birthday being so close – it’s like a week-long event every year.

Tuesday we went to the zoo for Logan’s birthday.  It was a perfect day.  I got off work early and, after lunch, the family headed for the zoo, despite the rain.  We had hats and snacks to keep us dry and happy.  Because it was mid-day and cool out, there were hardly any visitors.  And, the animals were all out and easily viewed.  The best part, in my opinion, was seeing the sea lions – one in particular kept circling around and swiming right past us.  It was amazing!!  I’ve never been so close to a sea lion before and he was breathtaking.  Logan had a great time and watching his reaction the whole afternoon was my favorite part of the day.

It’s great to watch Logan growing and changing.  He seems so much like a big 6-year-old these days.  I overheard him last night telling Kevin, “Dad, it’s wierd, but I don’t really feel six.  I still feel like I’m five.”  I laughed to myself thinking that if he was anything like me, he’d always have that problem:  feeling younger than you really are.

tonight April 13, 2010

The best part of my entire day was after dinner, planing in the backyard with my kids.  Three kids, three swings.  Oh, the joyous squeals every time Kevin would push them higher – and I would pretend to get smacked in the face by a swinging child’s legs.  Nothing like mom being a total goof to crack the kids up.  Should I be concerned that they got such a laugh over my fake injuries?  Perhaps.  But it was pretty funny, if I do say so for myself.

Oh, the joy of having 30 or more consecutive minutes rain-free in the NW.  I am so grateful to have a big, fenced backyard with a sandbox and play structure where the kids can run out and go wild for a few minutes here and there.  The hardest part – getting them back inside.  There were a lot of tears (mostly Addie tonight) when the playing was done and it was time to head in.  But my fail-proof parenting tactic (hey, I’m totally not above bribery rewarding), the promise of a cookie, made the trek a little easier.  Truthfully, I think the promise of a cookie makes a lot of things a little easier.

Cookies, jammies, snuggles, stories, blankets, binkies…it was a great night all around.  Still, the best part?  Watching the delighted smiles on the swings.

remembering April 10, 2010

Today we said goodbye to Kevin’s Grandpa Greg.  He was an amazing man who was very well-loved by frends and family alike.  While it was an honor to remember such a great man who lived a long, full, happy life, it was sad to say goodbye.  I am reminded of a poem read at my Grandad’s funeral:  “A Parable of Immortality” by Henry van Dyke.

I am standing by the seashore.
A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze
and starts for the blue ocean.
She is an object of beauty and strength,
and I stand and watch
until at last she hangs like a speck of white cloud
just where the sun and sky come down to mingle with each other.

Then someone at my side says, ‘There she goes!
Gone where? Gone from my sight – that is all.

She is just as large in mast and hull and spar
as she was when she left my side
and just as able to bear her load of living freight
to the places of destination.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her.

And just at the moment when someone at my side says,
‘There she goes! ‘ ,
there are other eyes watching her coming,
and other voices ready to take up the glad shout :
‘Here she comes!’

We will – and do – miss you, Grandpa Greg.

The Shape of a Mother April 5, 2010

From time to time, I come across a fantastic website – one that I check with great frequency.   One of my most favorite websites is The Shape of a Mother.  It’s beautiful.  It’s eye-opening.  It changed the way I feel about myself.  Now, that may seem a bit of a dramatic description for a website, but see for yourself and tell me you don’t feel a bit moved. 

In this site, I have found reassurance for how my post-babies body looks.  Women post pictures and entries sharing their experience with before, during, and after pregnancy.  It’s a beautiful idea.  As the author of this site states: “It occurred to me that a post-pregnancy body is one of this society’s greatest secrets.”  Really, I couldn’t agree more.  It is also, for me, a great reminder that our bodies have performed miracles, and we should hold them with the highest regard, not with shame or embarrasment.

 Check it out for yourself.  http://theshapeofamother.com/  I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

so happy together April 5, 2010

It hit me about 8:30 am this morning:  this is the first year that Kevin and I have celebrated Easter together.  Ever.  As I watched the kids’ excitement over candy baskets and egg hunts, I was overwhelmed with gratitude that my husband was home and able to share in the fun.

It was great to hear Logan’s excited words: “I found another egg!” or Addie’s dance of excitement as she waited for me to unwrap her candy, or Kaden’s squeals of joy over his new train.  Even better was watching Kevin getting to experience it all instead of hearing about it second-hand when he got home from work.

After breakfast, we drove to my sister’s house and had a wonderful lunch with my family.  Again, I was so thrilled to have Kevin by my side – not just to help with the kids, which is a huge plus, but to be together enjoying each other’s company.  I’m so grateful to have this time together as a family!  It was really a perfect holiday…if only I hadn’t eaten so much candy.

good for me March 30, 2010

I’m on week two of my workout extravaganza.  It’s been three months since I’ve regularly included workouts in my daily routine.  It’s funny, but I forget EVERY time how good I feel when I’m taking care of myself.  It’s like there are two cycles: the bad, self-defeating cycle, and the good, self-promoting cycle.

When I’m on the bad cycle, I eat poorly, stay up too late, don’t exercise, and feel horrible.  I drag myself through my days getting by on junk food and caffiene.  Which ultimately makes me more tired.  Which makes me eat more junk and drink more caffiene.  And on, and on.

The good cycle, conversely, feels so wonderful!  I eat well, plan my meals, make good food choices, exercise, drink water, sleep well (or as well as can be expected with three kids).  All which makes me feel more energized and enthusiastic.  Which in turn allows for more good choices.

The trouble is, when I’m on the bad cycle, it’s SO hard to jump off and get onto the good cycle.  I know, intellectually, that I will feel better if I can do it, but sometimes it’s so hard to muster up the energy to get to bed early, get up, workout, plan my meals, etc., and so easy to just eat chocolate and drink soda.  But, when I do, the difference is remarkable.  I feel so good and so full of energy, I can hardly understand why I ever leave the good cycle.

It’s a good reminder to me how important it is for us as women and moms, those who typically take care of others, to remember to take care of ourselves.  It’s also a good reminder, too, for me to invest in myself.  Whether it’s time alone, a good workout, a new pair of shoes, or lunch with a friend…it’s good for me.

back to life March 29, 2010

I’ve been toying with the idea for some time of bringing my blog back to life.  Considering that I have a readership of about 3 or 4 people, I’m certain that no one has missed me.  But, as I read through my old blogs, there were some feelings and memories long since forgotten that I was glad to have captured.  I want to have some form of scrapbook to capture times past both good and bad, and to have a window into my thoughts and feelings. 

So, without further ado, I will start again.  No apologies for time lost and events missed.  Just me, moving forward.  Isn’t that what we’re all really doing anyway?

first birthday June 24, 2009

Happy Birthday (eve), Addison and Kaden!  One year ago tomorrow, you were born.  One year.  I had no idea who you were, what you looked like, or how much my life would change.  I couldn’t wait to get you out – I was very, very uncomfortable and could hardly walk.  My feet were swollen.  I had slept for the last month sitting up on the couch so I could breathe.  I couldn’t fit into more than 3 shirts and 2 pairs of pants.  And flip-flops.

The day they told me you were going to be born, I was scared, shocked, surprised, happy, excited, worried, sad, overjoyed…to name a few.  I will never forget the feeling when you were born.  I hadn’t wanted a c-section, but having the two of you here safe and sound and hearing your cries for the first time was more that I could hope for.  Seeing you for the first time – by yourselves, and then the two of you together is something I will never forget – thanks in part to some great trick photography by your dad.  Those first hours of your life are very blurry for me, but I have so many memories of the first few days and weeks to keep me happy.

I can’t begin to remember all of the events of the first year of your life, but every day, I look at you both and think how I want to remember every second of every day like a movie in my head.  I can’t begin to tell you how much I love each of you.  I couldn’t imagine my life without you and can’t wait to spend the rest of my life getting to watch you grow and change.

I love you, Kade.  I love your sweet smile and even your screamy squeals.  I love your red hair and the way you snuggle up with me even though you try so hard not to fall asleep.  I love the way you look at me when you’re getting milkies, and how sensitive you are when your sister pulls your hair or takes your binkie.  I love the delight in your face and the way you wave your hands when you’ve found a treasure.  You are a true joy and pleasure to be around.

I love you, Addie.  I love your bright eyes and your curious mind.  I love the way you examine things and take it all in.  I love to watch you analyze people and give them the stare before you decide to let them into your heart.  I love it when you sleep butt-up in the air and squeal with joy when something makes you happy.  I love watching you adore your older brother and laugh at everything he does.  I love your smile and even the way you  swing your arms when you’re mad.  You are sweet and adorable and a bright spot in my world.

I’m a very blessed mommy.  Though this has been a hard, often-stressful life-altering year, I wouldn’t change it for the world.  Happy first birthday, babies.